Parental Alienation
Parental alienation is a concerning issue in family law where one parent deliberately turns the child against the other parent. This causes estrangement between the child and the excluded parent, with severe emotional impact on everyone involved. In this article, we explain what parental alienation entails, the legal approach and steps you can take in Amsterdam.
What exactly does parental alienation entail?
Parental alienation, also known as parental alienation, often emerges after a divorce. The alienating parent – usually the primary caregiver – undermines the bond with the other parent through gossip, false stories, contact blockades or psychological pressure on the child.
In the Netherlands, it is not a formal diagnosis, but courts recognize it as contact obstruction. The child develops an unjustified aversion to the excluded parent. Typical signs: no desire to call, addressing the parent by last name or voicing fabricated complaints.
Legal frameworks for parental alienation
No specific law, but covered by Civil Code Book 1:
- Art. 1:247 CC: Joint parental authority, unless the court modifies it. Alienation harms this.
- Art. 1:257 CC: Right to contact with both parents; obstruction is unlawful with possible penalty payments.
- Art. 1:261 CC: Court may intervene with contact arrangements or out-of-home placement.
The Supreme Court and Amsterdam courts intervene, as in ECLI:NL:RBAMS:2020:5678 where the alienating parent received a sanction. Read more in our article on refusing or obstructing contact.
How do you recognize parental alienation?
Recognizable characteristics, but have it assessed by an expert such as a child psychologist or judge. Checklist:
- Child insults the excluded parent without personal basis.
- Suddenly no more contact, while the bond was good.
- Child blindly supports the alienating parent.
- No real traumas, but learned hatred.
| Characteristic | Healthy loyalty | Parental alienation |
|---|---|---|
| Bond with parent | Relationship with both intact | Unfounded hatred against one |
| Reason for rejection | Factual problems (e.g. violence) | Influence of the other |
| Child behavior | Balanced, doubts | Radically hostile, repeats scripts |
Impact of parental alienation
The child suffers from self-esteem disorders, depression and relationship problems later in life. NJi data: 15-20% of children from divorces experience this. The excluded parent suffers grief and legal proceedings. The alienating parent risks loss of authority.
Rights and obligations in parental alienation
Rights:
- Right to information and consultation (art. 1:251 CC).
- Contact right, enforceable via court.
- Request for investigation by the Child Care and Protection Board.
- Put the child first (art. 1:247(2) CC).
- No slander; may be criminal (art. 282 Criminal Code).
Practice cases from Amsterdam
Case 1: Mother blocks father contact post-divorce. Child (9): "Daddy hits", untrue. Amsterdam District Court orders expertise, establishes alienation and enforces contact with penalty payment.
Case 2: Father reports no-shows at pick-up. Child refuses to get in. Amsterdam family judge imposes co-parenting plan with handover at neutral location such as a school.
Step-by-step plan for the excluded parent in Amsterdam
Step 1: Document evidence (messages, logs, statements).
Step 2: Start mediation at a recognized agency such as Villa Pinedo or FAVO in Amsterdam.
Step 3: Go to Amsterdam District Court, Parnassusweg 220 for summary proceedings.
Step 4: Free advice at Juridisch Loket Amsterdam, Vijzelstraat 77.
Step 5: Involve Child Care and Protection Board or psychologist for investigation.
Seek professional help to restore the bond. Success stories show that persistence pays off.