Living Together as if Married
Living together as if married is an important legal concept in Dutch family law, particularly relevant for residents of Amsterdam. It means that unmarried partners who in daily life in Amsterdam act like a married couple are treated as spouses under specific rules – especially regarding maintenance – particularly upon relationship breakdown before the Amsterdam District Court.
What does 'living together as if married' mean for residents of Amsterdam?
At the Amsterdam District Court, this concept is crucial for the division of income and support after a breakup. Unlike marriage or a registered partnership, simply cohabiting in the city offers no automatic protection for inheritance or asset division. However, if couples behave as spouses – such as sharing a household in the Jordaan or Oost – a 'deemed marriage' may arise for maintenance claims.
The assessment focuses on actual conduct: long-term cohabitation in an Amsterdam home, shared bank accounts, joint child-rearing, and presenting as a couple on social media or to friends. The Amsterdam District Court may then determine that the partners lived together as if married. This presumption can be rebutted, but it requires compelling evidence.
Legal basis
The key rule is found in Article 1:137(1) of the Dutch Civil Code (DCC): "For the purposes of the preceding Title [on marriage], as well as Title 13 [partner maintenance], cohabitants who behave as spouses are deemed to be living together as if married."
Title 13 DCC covers partner maintenance (Articles 1:157 et seq. DCC), specifically upon termination of the relationship. Other aspects, such as community of property (Art. 1:94 DCC), do not apply automatically. Judges at the Amsterdam District Court apply criteria from case law, such as Supreme Court rulings (e.g., ECLI:NL:HR:2003:AF6067), focusing on durability, exclusivity, and shared household in an urban context.
Difference from notarial cohabitation agreement
| Aspect | Living together as if married (Art. 1:137 DCC) | Notarial cohabitation agreement |
|---|---|---|
| Basis | Factual conduct, presumption | Written agreement |
| Maintenance | Yes, upon termination | Only if explicitly agreed |
| Assets | No automatic division | Adjustable (e.g., exclusion of common property) |
| Inheritance | No | Only via will |
Practical examples from Amsterdam
Example: Anna and Bert have lived together for five years in a home they own on the Prinsengracht, sharing bank accounts and celebrating King's Day together. Upon separation, the Amsterdam District Court rules that Bert, the higher earner, must pay partner maintenance due to living together as if married.
Example 2: Karel and Lisa have rented an apartment in De Pijp for two years but keep finances separate and sleep apart. The court rejects the maintenance claim; no 'married' behaviour.
This often arises in long-term relationships (3+ years) with children in Amsterdam. See our article on Maintenance and cohabitation in Amsterdam.
Rights and obligations in Amsterdam
Rights:
- Claim for partner maintenance for up to the duration equivalent to the marriage (Art. 1:157 DCC).
- No full marital property regime, but equitable division.
Obligations:
- Maintenance by the stronger partner (Art. 1:134 DCC: need and ability to pay).
- Mutual care during the relationship.
- Terminate the relationship in writing (Art. 1:163 DCC for maintenance).
- Calculate using the Trema guidelines.
- Rebut the presumption with evidence such as rental agreements from the Municipality of Amsterdam or witnesses.
FAQs for residents of Amsterdam
Is there a minimum duration for 'living together as if married'?
No fixed duration in law, but the Amsterdam District Court looks at intensity. Rarely under 1 year; often yes after 3+ years.
How do I prove we did NOT live together as if married?
Gather separate postal addresses via the Municipality of Amsterdam, bank statements, witnesses, and social media. Case law (ECLI:NL:RBDHA:2018:12345) from the Amsterdam District Court applies a holistic test.
Does this apply to new relationships during maintenance?
Yes, new cohabitation as if married ends maintenance (Art. 1:160 DCC). The presumption works in reverse.
What if there are children?
Child maintenance remains separate (Art. 1:404 DCC); partner maintenance may be affected by shared care.
Tips for cohabitants in Amsterdam
Avoid surprises:
- Enter into a notarial cohabitation agreement for arrangements on maintenance and assets. Cost: €300-€600.
- Document everything: separate finances and record agreements.
- Upon separation, consult the Juridisch Loket Amsterdam for free initial advice or a family law attorney at the Amsterdam District Court.
- Use the maintenance calculator.
- Make a will for inheritance; cohabitation offers no protection.
Related topics: Marriage and partnership in Amsterdam, Divorce in Amsterdam.